I NEED YOUR ADVICE (please!)

[Note: In case you’re wondering, this post is a follow-up to this (which received more messages than we’ve ever received). I try my best to respond to each and every message, BTW].

Ok . . . so I’m getting a LOT of messages from readers upset with me about that cliff hanger in my previous email and blog post.

Sorry about that. Perhaps the 1-6 year-old drama in my house is contagious (yikes).

Anyway, I’ve been feeling reluctant to talk about something. But it’s *long overdue* so here goes…

As you may or may not know, this whole fitness/health coaching for busy couples thing I do has gotten WAY out of control (in the best possible way).

When I first started helping married couples over 6 years ago . . . I never in a million years DREAMED I’d have the opportunity to have the impact I’ve had.

I’ve been blessed to have helped thousands of families transform their lives for the better.

And I’ve been deeply touched — and so many times permanently impacted — by all the incredible emails, letters, and life-changing responses you’ve sent over the years (and from all over the world).

On one touching occasion, a mom stopped by at a local soccer game to tell me personally that I had changed her life and marriage (it’s times like this that make everything worth it a 100 times over)!

And boy, have I learned a lot!!

So here is what I have been holding out on for years….

I’ve been:

  • Nicely asked
  • Strongly encouraged
  • Pleaded with . . .

To share the accumulation of what I have learned over the last 6+ years when it comes to transforming the life of busy families by going beyond the typical “fitness solutions” out there.  We’ve been blessed by the impact that Thrive90 Fitness has had on hundreds of couples and on-the-go parents, and the development of fast and effective workout programs and nutritional advice will always be part of everything we do.  However, we continue to hear again and again and again from you that even with the best tools, it’s a real struggle to actually make fitness happen consistently and for the long-term.

So, I’m talking about going WAY beyond great workouts and nutrition plans (again, these are important and will be included in everything we do) to address the REAL issues you struggle with when it comes to getting and staying healthy and fit.  The real life changing core issues like:

  • Time
  • Motivation
  • Accountability
  • Sleep
  • Sex
  • Reluctant Spouse
  • and so on…

For YEARS I’ve resisted teaching this stuff.

I made the usual mundane excuses like “I don’t have enough time” and “I’m too busy with my current work to actually teach something like this to others in a personal way.” And I’m embarrassed to admit that, as I looked around both the online and offline world of fitness and health . . .

. . . I wondered if I should be taking on such an undertaking when NO ONE else seems to be offering any help to busy families in these vital, life-changing areas.  I also wondered if I was even capable of teaching everything I’d learned over years of doing this. (Day in and day out, now, I’m realizing just how small this kind of thinking was).

Oh. And I’m also a bit of a perfectionist.

Okay “a bit” is a understatement . . . I’m a FULL BLOWN perfectionist.

And because I’ve given up all hope of fixing this, I realized that I simply cannot go half‐way with this.

As far as I am concerned – its **all the way** or not at all.

How I’m Trying to Learn From The Past

Before I wrote my book, busy couples and parents kept saying “Dustin you MUST write a book” and I thought “But every relationship is different, every family unique, how will I address all the different dynamics and situations?”

But I DID go onto write that book. And it ended up having an incredibly positive impact for so many busy couples.

It would have been small minded of me to NOT write that book.  And I’m beginning to think that not sharing what I know about the true keys to achieving a fit, family-centered lifestyle (out of fear that it hasn’t been done before) is just as small minded.

So I’m Seriously Considering Doing This

Despite my fears, hesitancy, and perfectionism, I am seriously considering pulling back the curtain and showing you just about everything that Tony and I know about achieving an awesome, fit lifestyle that keeps your family first and lasts for a lifetime.

And sharing stuff I’ve never publicly shared with ANYONE about how I transformed my life years ago and how my family has made this a part of who we are even in the face of a culture that pushes us the other way.

(I would have LOVED to have had this training 10 years ago when we were first married).

If I Do This, It Will Be A LOT Of Work

I’m excited about sharing stuff with you, but I’ve been around long enough to know that my small projects quickly get out of hand and turn into big ones.

So I only want to do this if there’s enough interest.

So I want to know . . .

What do you think?

• Should I do this?

• Would you be interested?

Your feedback and thoughts are absolutely the fuel that keeps me going.

And I don’t want to even think about doing this unless there’s enough potential interest.

Anyway, if you have a second, please leave a comment below and let me know what you think.

It would mean a lot to me, and I’ll do my best to respond to each and every comment.

Talk soon,

Dustin Riechmann

P.S. – I’m writing this from a Starbucks in San Diego.  I decided to fly out and talk about this BIG idea with Tony in person.  Like me, he’s excited about it but anxious to hear if this is something you would be interested in.

Comments

  1. Well, your post has me intrigued, but I’m still not really sure what it is you are going to be doing. I get that you are going to be sharing with us your insight on theses topics – but in what format? If it were a book, I would absolutely be interested. This post and the previous one have me thinking it would be something more than a book though.

    • Thanks, Sarah.

      Your question is a fantastic one, and the truth is I’m not sure yet what format this would take. I first wanted to see if our community wants this kind of help. If so, I want to work beside you to decide how best to make it happen to ensure people get the fit lifestyle they desire.

      Dustin

  2. Yes, absolutely, unequivocally, yes.

    I, too, am a little confused as to how you plan to share your knowledge (paid subscriptions, physical book, blog posts with advertising as income), regardless, jump in. It will only help you learn and grow and be even more helpful to your clients. You can say, “what I’m telling you worked through this pile of success and/or failure, it can work in your situation, too.”

    • Thanks, AmandaT!

      Like I mentioned above, the “how” to bring this knowledge to others is something we will figure out if we move forward. The “what” will also get refined, but basically I’m envisioning a close-knit community where we provide the practical tools needed to not only get fit, but sustain it as a lifestyle that your entire family benefits from. This would surely include the workouts and nutritional tools that are needed, but our vision goes beyond this…we want to help busy couples find the time, keep the motivation and ensure that their family stays at the center of their healthy lifestyle.

      Of course, this is new territory that will require a lot of investment of my (and Tony’s) time and energy, so we need to know if these are outcomes that people really want. 🙂

      Thanks!

      Dustin

  3. I’ve enjoyed reading these posts from you, Dustin. One thing I appreciate about both you and Tony is the way you guys go all out with whatever you do to make it great. If the marketplace is asking you for more, than by all means – you have an obligation to give it!
    I will look forward to whatever you are creating. You know how passionate I am as well about building healthy bodies and marriages. Go for it!!

    P.S. While you are in San Diego, make sure you guys go to Fins and eat a yummy fish taco for me. I know everyone thinks Rubios has the best fish tacos, but I love all the salsas and choices at Fins! Yum, yum yum.

    • Thanks for your support and passion, Gina!

      You’re right, I keep hearing about Rubios but you’ve piqued my interest in Fins. 🙂

  4. Dustin,
    If you feel lead by the Lord to do this, then jump on it. God will give us the desires of our heart. Is this in your heart or just in the heart of others.
    If your not sure, continue to pray and seek Godly council.
    Keep up the great work.
    God Bless,
    Steve

    • Steve, I really appreciate your comment. This is absolutely on my heart (and Tony’s as well), which is why I’ve been living it for years. Of course, practically speaking, we need to know if others desire this for their families, as that will give us the guidance we need from our community to know if this is worthwhile of our efforts.

      Thanks again!

      Dustin

  5. “Fit Marriage is here to empower you with the knowledge, tools and motivation to get fit and improve your relationship in the process.” I think your sharing this stuff fits your business’ mission. Your not sharing makes it seem like you’re holding out on us. I joined because your website says you’re going to share this stuff.

    If you can’t get a fish taco, at least get a carne asada burrito from one of the hole in the wall taquerias.

    • You’re absolutely right, Julie. These topics absolutely fit our mission, and we know from our community that SO MANY struggle with time and motivation. We’ve worked hard to provide the tools we felt were needed, but now we’re feeling drawn to go further and push the envelope to do something truly unique and perhaps a bit revolutionary in the fitness arena.

      As I noted above, this would surely include the workouts and nutritional tools that are needed, but our vision goes beyond this…we want to help busy couples find the time, keep the motivation and ensure that their family stays at the center of their healthy lifestyle. But I want this to be provided in a way that goes beyond what we can do here on the blog…if there’s a real desire out there.

      Thanks!

      Dustin

      P.S. – I love the passion for San Diego food here in the comments!

  6. Dustin, you know how Bruce and I have been helped by you and Tony. We have learned a lot from you both! Like you, I wish I’d known a lot of this stuff that we know now 10 years ago in our marriage.

    It boils down to this: The world needs you. Couples need you. Families need you. Let’s find a way to make sure that every couple has a chance to have a great, FIT, beautiful lifestyle. That every family gets back to the basics and enjoys life the way it should be!

    You have our support 110%! Please don’t hesitate to let us know how we can help you! You’ve helped us and so many more!

    • Wow Shawna, thank you SO much for sharing your thoughts. It’s so rewarding to hear how our efforts have helped you and Bruce, and I couldn’t agree more with your passionate statements about how important health and fitness is for families.

      Thank you!

      Dustin

  7. Definitely do this! My husband and I need help in those areas and would love to be able to go to a place that gives us that kind of direction with the right balance.

    • Awesome, Sarah! I love your point about finding the right balance. That is critically important, especially for us busy couples who are pulled in so many directions.

      Dustin

  8. Go for it my friend(s).

    Who knows what an adventure this will be!

  9. I just found your website and I am really liking what I have found so far. This sounds like it would be an excellent addition! I know I could use the help.

    • Thanks so much, Lisa. We appreciate your support and your input about this possible new addition to the Fit Marriage movement.

  10. Daniele O'Toole says:

    You know Pat and I are always interested in whatever you have going on. We would love to see you persue this, and please be sure to keep us in the loop!!!! And, of course, if there is anything we can do to help, let us know 🙂

    • Thanks for being there with such strong support, Daniele. You know we appreciate that, and it brings us great joy to help you and Pat, too.

      Thanks! 🙂

      Dustin

  11. I would certainly be interested! What would make it MORE complete (and applicable to my family) is if you included any faith transformations and changes. I think that there are already many secular “how-tos” out there. However, as a young Catholic family (with small kids), the posts and advice in your book we found most useful were rooted in your faith. I know that might narrow your prospective audience a bit, but I can’t imagine you could be 100% honest about “…transform[ing] my life years ago… in the face of a culture that pushes us the other way” without including faith.
    Keep us updated!

    • Caitlin,

      You bring up such an EXCELLENT point! What we are envisioning is a holistic approach to health, and spiritual health is definitely a key component. While it hasn’t been mentioned (there are obviously a lot details to work out), we definitely would include components related to faith.

      And you are absolutely right about how my own faith journey has impacted all areas of my life and marriage, including my health. So, if we move forward, you can expect to hear personal stories related to spiritual health.

      Thanks!

      Dustin

  12. I would TOTALLY be interested! My preferred format would be regularly scheduled group coaching calls, or maybe podcasts (they would need to be downloadable through itunes or google listen, though). Addclasses.com has a coaching model I’ve really enjoyed. 🙂 looking forward to it, in whatever form!

    • Awesome, Lindsey! Like I’ve said above, there are still a lot of details to work out if we decide to move forward with this initiative, but group coaching calls would likely be involved since this is such a fantastic way to teach, give feedback, motivate, etc. I’ll check out your suggestion of AddClasses.com.

      Thanks so much!

      Dustin

  13. I only became acquainted with your program within the last two weeks. So far, I like what I’ve seen and done (videos)! There is so much material already, that I find it a bit overwhelming, and my husband keeps reminding me to take it one-step-at-a-time.

    Am I interested in hearing, reading, seeing more about healthy marriages and healthy bodies? Yes!!

    Should YOU take the next step? I believe that is a decision best made with (1) prayer and discernment about God’s will for your life; (2) prayerful dialogue with your wife; and (3) in consultation with several people you respect within the realm of the business of marriage, health, and family (Tony, being one, of course!). God will lead the way.

    Though I like what I see on your website, and I (like most consumers) always want more-and-better, you ultimately must be true to God, your spouse, your children, and yourself. That’s what a Fit Marriage really entails!

    Blessings!

    • Thanks, Cathy!

      I am really glad to hear that you’re enjoying your experience with our materials. If you ever feel stuck or need direction regarding what to do next, don’t hesitate to let us know.

      I also appreciate your advice regarding the discernment of whether we should take this next step. We will certainly be praying about it as well, and our wives are vital to our decision making process.

      Thanks so much again for your insights. 🙂

      Dustin

  14. christina says:

    I stumbled upon your website, and stayed! Although I have a good marriage and a great husband, I know that there is always room for improvement. Marriages are attacked from so many angles today, that anything anyone can do to shore marriages up, encourage and foster development of great marriage is well worth doing.
    Marriages is not easy, it is hard work, grueling at times, but so well worth it. I would strongly encourage you to go ahead, assuming the decision is well covered in prayer and godly counsel. This is a big task, and I am grateful for your willingness to take it on.
    Blessings
    Christina

    • We’re so grateful you are here, Christina!

      I totally agree with you regarding the attack on marriage in our culture, and we’ve found that healthy individuals are in a much better position to enjoy healthy marriages.

      Again, your support and enthusiasm for our mission mean a lot to me.

      Thanks!

      Dustin

  15. christina says:

    what is the book called?

    • Hey Christina,

      My book is called 15 Minute Marriage Makeover and you can see all the details on it here:

      http://www.15minutemarriagemakeover.com

      Also, Tony and his wife Alisa have written a wonderful book called Stripped Down, which you can see here:

      http://www.oneextraordinarymarriage.com/store/stripped-down/

      Thanks for your interest!

      Dustin

  16. Dustin,

    Love the book, got stuck on day 6, talked through it and started again yesterday….after 18 years, it feels like dating again and that’s definately GOOD>

    Can’t wait to see what you come up with next!!!

    Thanks,
    Tina

    • Thanks so much, Tina! I’m really excited to hear that you’re feeling like you are dating your husband again. That’s fantastic!

      I appreciate your support.

      Dustin

  17. Sounds like a useful tool for couples and I’d be interested in your advice for families to be healthy. I feel like my family is doing pretty well in this area, but we always can use more tools to stay motivated, especially in the depths of winter in the Midwest. I know you know about that! Good luck, Dustin.
    Lori

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  1. […] #2: In case you're wondering, this post is a FOLLOW UP TO THIS POST which received over 30 wonderful comments and even more personal emails from all over the U.S. and […]

  2. […] been really humbled by the buzz surrounding my last blog post at Fit Marriage.  There was some confusion about exactly what I was considering, but it’s clear that the BIG […]

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